Azaleas

Joey: SO! Back to Chipotle yet again for another $4.99 rice lobotomy when I spotted this guy.  Brandon here was multitasking back and forth from his ipad to his ipod seamlessly.  It was as if he was reviewing the same bit of internet based content from one platform to the next crosschecking for errors.  It really was something to behold.  In fact he distracted me SO much that the lady behind me at the soup kitchen coughed a bit to move me along.  To which I replied with a homemade murder face in her general direction.  After further inspection it turns out that Chuck was watching a movie on Ipad whilst undergoing some sort of social networking on the other mobile device.  I could only venture a guess that he wasn't actually undergoing any kind of real conversation with any real person because his horribleness was too apparent to even be masked when connecting on a non-personal level. Anyway, I'm sure the status updates he was reviewing while choking down spoonfuls of mixed beans canned 20 years ago by a migrant worker who bought apple options early and now lives next to Mark Cuban whose azaleas he repeatedly urinates on during vodka benders to which many complaints have been filed with the local authorities.  I dunno, maybe it was the smudges of body oil all over his ipad screen, that cause me to be unable to see the horribleness undoubtably unfolding on it, or those on his glasses that convinced me this man was a next level asshole.  He didn't even have the volume up!  Unless you are straining to read subtitles through an inch of human waste on the screen, which i assure you would be impossible, there is no way to get any sort of pleasure from a muted video.  He didn't have the sound on or I would of caught a lil Crouching Tiger Hidden Asshole audio.  The only reasonable explanation is that he must have such debilitating social anxiety that he must keep his face focused on Baby's Day Out to even venture into public.  The ordering process must have been hilarious!  Alright, I'll give an update post after I've followed him home and realize it's Seany.  Where's the goddamn Advil!